Wednesday, August 12
Jealousy
One of my friends recently met two of my fave YouTubers. When I heard, I was completely and utterly filled up with one feeling: jealousy. I started crying. I was thinking: Why her? Why not me? I deserve it much more than her! I have wanted to meet these people for the past 1.5 years, and I was devastated that it had been her who got to meet them.
Why, i ask myself now? Why couldn't I just be happy for her, one of my closest friends, that she ticked this thing off her bucket list? Why did I have to have this stupid feeling inside of me, which was pulling me down and making me miserable?
It is a selfish feeling. We want something that someone else has. It's normal.
But I have become so f*cking tired of this feeling. Of being jealous. I just want to be happy with what I have, or with where I am. I shouldn't be scared that everyone else has a better life, because they probably don't. They sure as hell have worries and problems too. Just like me. I shouldn't be jealous of their lives, I should make the most of my own.
a place where i write things that i don't have the courage to say out loud. or just things that no one i know wants to listen to.
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I went through this too. There is this girl who met Ryan Higa more than five times, and even went for a dinner afterparty sort of thing with him and the rest of the crew. I don't know her personally I just saw a lot of pictures on Instagram. And that just basically made me SO jealous. I can totally understand what you feel. I was all like she gets to meet him FIVE times, and I couldn't even meet him once.
ReplyDeleteIt sucks, but we learn to get over it.
I don't feel jealous anymore. I'm kinda indifferent now, to be honest.
You'll get over the jealousy too. Give it time.
Love xx
Saee
Some things just aren't fair.
DeleteBut we get over it. I mean, there are so many people who have it much, much worse than I do, so I should really not get too worked up about this.